Cine Awards in Rural Uttarakhand

From Here and There
(A Satire)
Cine Awards in Rural Uttarakhand
Bhishma Kukreti

Today, in Mumbai, I got telephonic call from my cousin from my native village,” Bhishma ! This is urgent .You will have to be very active.”
I answered , “ Sorry Bhaiji ! I forgot to write letters to Gramin Jal Vibhag Lansdowne that all the water reservoirs in Jaspur are dried up and villagers have to go three Kilometers for water .”
My Bhaiji told,” Forget about drying of all water reservoirs in Jaspur and we have to travel three four kilometers for water . We shall bear that difficult hardship as our forefathers used to tolerate we shall also bear”
“Is there another problem like no electricity. From Mumbai, I shall write a strong letter to the executive engineer Gramin Vidyut Vibhag , Pauri for that matter” I interrupted
He said,” No ! No ! electricity is urgent but now, electricity is not that important .”
Guessingly I said, “ Is our village school without teachers? If so I shall post a strong letter from Mumbai to the education minister Dehradun”
He answered,” No !No that is not the case and is also not a very burning issue, Teacher less school in our village is part and partial of our life.”
I again speculated and said,” Should I send hundredth reminder to the health minister Dehradun that there is no nursing staff and doctor in our village hospital for last twenty five years?”
He said calmly,” We villagers are happy with hospital Guards (Choukidar) and sweeper taking care of patients very effectively. They both are better than so called trainee doctors or nursing staff”
I made presumption and verbalized,” Should I write a long letter to transport minister Dehradun that fifty years old planned motor road is still incomplete and our village folks have to go seven miles on foot to catch motor?”
He said,” Yes! Motor road is a long time problem but the transportation problem is not that much critical crisis”
I estimated and said,” Oh! I forgot very grave issue that in our Dhangu , there are around fifty graduates who are not getting employment for many years. I shall write a letter to chief minister of Uttarakhand for eradicating unemployment from our Dhangu area.”
My cousin spoke , “ Definitely unemployment had been a quandary but at present , the unemployment has no relevancy at all. Every graduate is registered with Jawahar Rojgar Yojna and they are happy to earn by doing some hard work.
I asked, “ What is the real and vital issue in village”
He disclosed, “ You know we organize Nagraja Pujai every third year and this year there is cooperative Nagraja Pujai .”
I answered , “ Yes! Most of the migrated villagers from all over India are coming to village participating in Nagraja Pujai”
He detailed,” Now our village council decided that at the time of Nagraja Pujai, we shall also distribute Uttarakhand Cine Awards”
Shockingly, I questioned, “ How come ! The Cine Awards are more urgent than other burning issues?”
He said,” Each village council in our area is organizing Uttarakhand Cine Awards. Now, organizing Cine awards has become prestigious point for every village concils in the are. If our village council will not organize Uttarakhand Cine Awards , our prestige would go down.”
I wanted to explain, “ But water problem…”
He said, “ It is question of status of our village. We must do something for our prestige. . Nak Ka Sawal hai, Hamen Apni Nak Bachani hai”
Reluctantly, I asked, “ Should I write letter to Cultural Minister in Dehradun ?”
He said, “ No ! No you don’t need to write any letter as you, usually write letters to authorities in Uttarakhand on our behalf from Mumbai . We have already convinced Vijaya Barthwal ji the minister of Uttarakhand and our area M LA and she will inaugurate Uttarakhand Cine Awards Jaspur.”
I asked, “ Bhaiji ! What do you expect from me ?”
He ordered ,” Just collect two lakh rupees from our villagers in Mumbai .. I have already told Delhi, Dehradun wale to collect three four lakhs to save our prestige and everybody is happy that we are protecting our village prestige by organizing Uttarakhand Cine Awards “

Copyright @ Bhishma Kukreti, Mumbai, India, 2010