Bhishma Kukreti
The general election is near in various states and all political parties are in the process of face lifting of their images. For face lifting their images, every political party is in search of new spokesperson.
I got call from spokesperson of All India Western UP Dal, Sir! We need a new spokesperson. We feel you suit for the job”
I asked, “What are my qualities that suit to your job?”
He answered, Sir! We need spokesperson that is brave enough to hide our leader’s weaknesses and could bring weaknesses of other political leaders. Since, you write satire, we feel you are the best to bring out weaknesses of other political parties.”
I asked, “ You mean Charitrhanan of other leaders?”
The spokesperson said, “Yes Sir! We need who can attack blatantly on personal characters of each political leader”
I said,” Sorry Sir! We satirists attack on characteristics and not on person. You need political person and not satirists to do your job.”
There was a call from Samajvadi Party, “ Sir! We need to over hall our image. You are in advertisement profession and at the same time you are a writer too.”
I asked,” What do you think about new spokesperson?”
He answered,” We need the spokespersons that can hide our past sins candidly.”
I answered,” Sorry sir! You politicians can hide your own sins but we satirists bring out the sins before our readers. I am not fit for your job.”
A call came from BSP and the person said,” sir! We need the spokesperson that can blame our bad works on our opposition parties.”
I asked, “Can you clarify please?”
BSP spokesperson answered, “As who can blame worsening law order in out rule on all our opposition parties. Many of our ministers are caught in rape cases, looting, exhortation etc. Now we want that our spokesperson blame on opposition parties for misdeeds of our ministers.”
I said,” Sorry sir! We satirists don’t blame others but to those who did misdeeds. You should find such spokespersons from political arena only.”
A call came from Akali dal,” Sir! We want spokespersons those can prove that Akali Dal workers are lesser corrupt than Congress party workers.”
I answered,” Sorry Sir! For satirists, the corruption is corruption and for us, there is no scale which can measure lesser or more corrupt deeds”
A call came from Bhartiy Janta Party head quarter,” Sir! We have army of expert spokespersons of manipulating truth into falsehood and falsehood into truth. But we require fresh face that can hide the corruption of Ramesh Pokhariyal, Yadurappa, mining mafia Jagnath Reddy, state sponsored riots by Modi etc. The spokespersons should be soulless”
I answered, sorry sir! Satirist doesn’t change truth into falsehood. We satirists have souls.”
A call came from Congress party management cell,” sir we need shameless spokespersons those can deny all true allegations on our ministers!”
I answered, “But! Congress has tens of shameless spokesperson those can deny shamelessly the existences of sun and moon and you don’t need more shameless spokespersons.”
The Congress party public relation manager answered, “You are right that we have good numbers of shameless spokespersons who shamelessly can deny the proven allegations on our ministers but unfortunately all spokespersons are exposed much and we need newer, fresh ruthless and shameless spokespersons to deal denying proved allegations on our ministers.”
I answered,” Sorry sir! We satirists expose the shameless characteristics but we feel shame when we indulge in antisocial works.”
He said,” You may take your time. Whenever you feel you are shameless you may join our brigade of shameless spokesperson cell.”
(This looks like true story but is purely work of fiction and imagination)
Copyright @ Bhishma Kukreti
Nicely written..Its a satire but sir its wonderful as it truly shows the real face of our politicians and our political parties..while reading i lost out as if i am in the midst of these conversation..Good work keep it up!
ReplyDelete